I’ve been feeling so sad lately. My little man, my last little baby is self weaning himself. =( He’s my last baby out of 5 children so it kind of stinks. I have breastfed all of my children from the day they were born but I always either gave up thinking I wasn’t enough to keep them fed or it was easier in that time of my life to give them a bottle instead. When I got pregnant with him I knew he was going to be my last so I wanted to do everything different this time because it would be my last chance.
My son was born with tongue tie and a chromosomal disorder. Both made breastfeeding VERY hard. Not to mention the thrush that came with antibiotics that were given to me in the hospital that made my breasts and nipples scream in pain! That lasted almost 2 months! A lot of people couldn’t believe I didn’t give up with all that pain when he would nurse. I just kept telling myself I love him so much and want what’s best for him and it was my last chance. There were many nights of “cluster feeding” that left me thinking I wasn’t good enough or he wasn’t getting enough from me. Even family members were thinking the same thing. After talking to other moms and reading tons of online literature it was NORMAL and I wasn’t the only one going through the same thing.
After a few months everything was so easy. There was more time in between him feeding so things got easier. He had mastered breastfeeding even though he had tongue tie. I wasn’t in pain anymore thank god! =) My son just turned 1 in June and I’m proud of myself for breastfeeding him for a year straight. =) The last month or so he’s been weaning himself and at first he was only nursing at night when he woke up but now he’s sleeping through the night most nights which of course is great but I miss laying next to him while he nursed himself back to sleep. Now he’s only having little snack breaks lol every few days, so reality is eventually very soon he will no longer want to nurse. I get sad about it of course but then I feel proud that I made it over a year.