“Don’t give up”

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I have always wanted to breastfeed my children and always did right from the start but with my oldest 4 I gave up because I thought I wasn’t making enough or it was just way easier to give a bottle. With my last pregnancy I swore I would do everything it took to be able to breastfeed him as long as I could. My son has Q.22.11.2 duplication disorder and I wanted the best for him. Right from the beginning we were having problems, he was having a hard time latching on and wasn’t eating much. I kept refusing a bottle and formula. At his first visit at 5 days old he had lost too much weight and I was told that I had to supplement him with formula. Of course as you all know that the hormones after you have a baby are like woah! I was so hurt and angry! After that visit I really worked hard on being able to get this breastfeeding business figured out. There was long nights, no sleep, he still had a hard time latching on. I had to give him supplements a few times because he always acted like I wasn’t enough. I started to feel the same way. 🙁 He would only nurse on one side, he hated the right side so I had to pump all the time. When we were about 2 weeks into it my breasts and nipples were so sore, I couldnt even take a shower without it being uncomfortable. It was painful every time he latched on. I finally went to visit a lactation consultant and she had noticed he had tongue tie, and that could contribute to having a hard time latching and causing the soreness. I had read about nipple pain and had learned of thrush. Needless to say that was exactly what was going on for the first 2 months of pain. Nothing worked except the last try of gentian violet recommended by my ob. Man that was a lifesaver.  For about 4 months he seemed to have this period at night where he wanted to eat for 4 hours in a row (cluster feeding), holy cow! I couldn’t eat I couldn’t leave the bed.. I thought I wasn’t enough at that point as well but he knew what he was doing, he was setting himself up to have mommies boobies make all the milk he needed for the future..  🙂 I haven’t been in pain since and my little guy is 8 1/2 months now and been nursing ever since he was born, hasn’t had a bottle or formula since he was a month old. 🙂 I know not everyone can nurse for health reasons or by choice. For those of you that feel like your never enough and ready to quit, please don’t you are enough and it is a lot of hard work but they are so worth it, breastfeeding is worth it. Im so glad I didn’t give up..

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